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Archive for the ‘Personal’ Category

OUR PARENTS


This was narrated by an IAF pilot to IIT students during a Seminar on Human Relations:
Venkatesh Balasubramaniam (who works for IIT) describes how his gesture of booking an air ticket for his father, his maiden flight, brought forth a rush of emotions and made him (Venkatesh) realize that how much we all take for granted when it comes to our parents. My parents left for our native place on Thursday and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact, my father had never traveled by air before, so I just took this opportunity to make him experience the same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by train, I got them tickets on Jet Airways. The moment I handed over the tickets to him, he was surprised to see that I had booked them by air.. The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting for the time of travel. Just like a school boy, he was preparing himself on that day and we all went to the airport, right from using the trolley for his luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for a window seat and waiting restlessly for the security check-in to happen. He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was overcome with joy watching him experience all these things. As they were about to go in for the security check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes and thanked me. He became very emotional and it was not as if I had done something great but the fact that this meant a great deal to him. When he said thanks, I told him there was no need to thank me. But later, thinking about the entire incident, I looked back at my life. As a child, how many dreams our parents have made come true. Without understanding the financial situation, we ask for cricket bats, dresses, toys, outings, etc. Irrespective of their affordability, they have catered to all our needs. Did we ever think about the sacrifices they had to make to accommodate many of our wishes? Did we ever say thanks for all that they have done for us? Same way, today when it comes to our children, we always think that we should put them in a good school. Regardless of the amount of donation, we will ensure that we will have to give the child the best, theme parks, toys, etc. But we tend to forget that our parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that their dreams are realized and what they failed to see when they were young. It is our responsibility to ensure that they experience all those and their life is complete. Many times, when my parents had asked me some questions, I have actually answered back without patience. When my daughter asks me something, I have been very polite in answering. Now I realize how they would have felt at those moments. Let us realize that old age is a second childhood and just as we take care of our children, the same attention and same care needs to be given to our parents and elders. Rather than my dad saying thank you to me, I would want to say sorry for making him wait so long for this small dream. I do realize how much he has sacrificed for my sake and I will do my best to give the best possible attention to all their wishes. Just because they are old does not mean that they will have to give up everything and keep sacrificing for their grandchildren also. They have wishes, too.. Take care of your parents. THEY ARE PRECIOUS.

Category:

General, Personal

LIVING A LIFE


Life is a fact,
Living is an art.
Upon us to act,
With choices called ‘smart’.
Neither with options ‘wierd’,
Nor should be feared.
But accept with grace,
The hardships we face.
Whether sweet or sour,
Are the grapes of life,
Stay who we are,
Without bitterness or strife.
Would rather not live,
Than leave my sanity.
More fulfilling to ‘give’,
Than ‘take’ for vanity.
Life’s road takes turn,
Brings lessons to learn.
With display of dignity,
We ascend to eternity.

Ilmana Fasih
10 November 2010
Dulles Airport, Washington DC.

Category:

General, MY POETRY, Personal, Poetry

HUSBAND HUMOUR


Copied some jokes from here n there to HONOUR our sweet husbands like mine, who tolerate a lot of crap from us wives (at least my husband does a great deal). He is an epitome of Tolerance I must say, to the extent that he needs to be beatified into a “Husband Saint”’
Let us women be the ‘butt’ of jokes for a change ;).

A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept him on the way home. When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.
“Who are you?” he asked.
“I’m the Devil,” she responded.
“Well, come on home with me,” he said, “I married your sister.
________________________
A man left work one Friday afternoon. Being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spent his entire paycheck. When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.
Finally, his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, “How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?”
To which he replied, “That would be fine with me.”
Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.
________________________
“Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?” asked Jane’s best friend.
“Why shouldn’t I?” said Jane.
“Well, maybe he is having an affair?”
“No way” said Jane “he never returns with any fish…”
_________________________
A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he’s 6 feet 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him.
The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, “You can’t believe her. He’s 5 feet 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face.”
The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, “Just because I reported him missing, doesn’t mean I wanted him back!”
__________________________
A woman came up behind her husband while he was enjoying his morning coffee and slapped him on the back of the head.
“I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name ‘Marylou’ written on it,” she said, furious. “You had better have an explanation.”
“Calm down, honey,” the man replied. “Remember last week when I was at the dog track? That was the name of the dog I bet on.”
The next morning, his wife snuck up on him and smacked him again.
“What was that for?” he complained.
“Your dog called last night.”
__________________________
A woman finds a genie’s lamp. The Genie comes out and says, “You may have three wishes, but your husband will get ten times more than what you wished for.”
The woman agrees. Her first wish was that she would be the most beautiful woman in the world. “You realize,” the Genie said, “that your husband will be ten times more beautiful than you, and more women will gawk at him?”
“That’s okay,” says the woman, “He’ll only look at me because I will be the most beautiful women.” So the wish is granted.
Her second wish was that she would be the richest woman in the world. “You know your husband will be ten times richer, right?” the Genie asks.
“That’s okay. What’s mine is his and what’s his is mine,” replied the woman. So the wish was granted.
The woman then thinks long and hard about her last wish. She finally wishes that she had a mild heart attack.
A man approached a very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and said, “I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?”
The woman looked puzzled. “Why do you want to talk to me?” she asked.
“Because every time I talk to a pretty woman like you, my wife appears out of nowhere”


_________________________
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.
_____________________
What do you do if your best friend runs off with your husband?
Miss her. Pity her.
______________________
A woman was cleaning her husbands dresser drawers when she found 3 golf balls and a box with $2000 in it. She waited for him to come home from the golf course to ask him why these things were hidden in his dresser drawer.
The husband said I’m sorry I hid this from you but the truth is every time I cheated on you over the last 30 years I put a golf ball in the drawer.
The wife was very upset at first but after thinking about it said “I guess 3 times in 30 years is really not that bad! Oh by the way what is the $2000 in the drawer.
The husband replied” Well every time I got to a dozen balls I sold them.
_____________________________
What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
About 45 pounds.
What’s the differece between a husband and a boyfriend?
45 minutes.
___________________________

And the best three are at the bottom:
Hillary Clinton goes to a psychic who tells her: “Prepare yourself for widowhood … Your husband is about to die a violent death.”
Mrs. Clinton takes a deep breath and replies: “Will I be acquitted?”
__________________________
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands. When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
“You’re running around with other women,” she charged.
“You’re being unreasonable,” Adam responded. “You’re the only woman on earth.” The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest. It was Eve.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Adam demanded.
“Counting your ribs!”

__________________________
A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, “You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150.” The ma N thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, “Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?”
The man replied, “Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance.”
XXXXXXXXX

IlmanaFasih

28 October 2010

Category:

General, Humour, Personal, Social Issues, Women

A TRUE FRIEND


A Friend.
He loves you,
But is not your beloved.
He cares for you,
But is not your kin.
He shares your pain,
But is not your blood.
Scolds like a Pa
Cares like a Ma
Pampers like a sis
Annoys like a bro
And after all loves u,
more than you know.
A true friend is a gem.
Are hard to see,
Harder still to have them,
Even harder to be.
A true friend to be,
I wish it was me.
….and my ’girl’ friend SAMINA adds:
To all you can’t be,
To some you may be,
To one you must be.

IlmanaFasih

28 October 2010

Category:

MY POETRY, Personal, Poetry

OH! THESE STUDIOUS GIRLS


Dedicated to all those ambitious girls in the world…..

One takes pride when one’s dream comes true through one’s child entering a world ranking university.
Ace students, never needed to be told to study, always look busy, attending late classes, carrying loads of books, rushing with assignment deadlines etc etc.
Lucky are we parents who brought forth such girls. Indeed they are a great bunch of lasses.
I click on my daughter and her friends’ walls to write a good luck note.
I read their crazy statuses and get the exact idea of how serious they are for their midterms. I copy paste some of their statuses, that my eyes had to bear:
SiLeNcE,
Is the best Answer for all questions….!
SmILe Is the best
Reaction in all situations
Unfortunately
BOTH Never Help In any examination , Test, …!
Disclaimer Notice: Student’s declaration at the end of answer paper!”I hereby declare that answers written above r true 2 the best of mine & my friend’s knowledge & I claim no responsibility whatsoever 4 any mistakes. Whatever I have written is truly fictitious & any resemblance with the Subject Matter is purely Coincidental.”

If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the integral symbol.
A New Added element to the Periodic Table.
Element Name: GIRL
Symbol: G
Atomic Weight: don’t even dare to ask 😀
Physical Properties..
*boils at anything
*can freeze at anytime
*melts if handled wid love n care
*very bitter if mis handled
Chemical Properties.
*very reactive
*highly unstable
*posses strong affinity for gold n silver
*money reducing agent
*volatile when left alone
Bring a chit on exam day, scratch and show it to your nearest teacher and win free trip to Principal’s office and enjoy 3 years vacation at home.Hurry offer valid until exams only….
Everything has been figured out, except how to study for tests!!!
hayyyy *******! how is the prep for the bio test? dude Can you bring your polka-dot skirt/dress thing tomorrow (A) I wanna wear it on wednesday (A) (with the belt plz hehehe) And I’ll bring your flats tomorrow LOL
Aawwwwww, let’s drop out of uni 😀 😀 !!!!!
You know, we should ALLLLLLLLLLL just drop out all of a sudden
then UFT will go broke and it’ll close down
then it’ll get desperate for money
and it’ll start asking people to join uni again FOR FREE !
and then we’ll say “get lost you idiotsssss !!
We’ll only join if you promise to make the courses easy”
then they’ll agree and we all will get 4.0 and we’ll become filthy rich 😀
and then we all will live happily ever after 🙂
assignments.midterms.assignments.midterms.assignments.midterms- Dimaag ka band bajgaya hain 😐

looks like a zombie ! the ugly kind lol. its been only 3 weeks of school. bags underneath my eyes, scarfs down, no makeup, big frumpy shirt, consuming lotsa junk (disgusting machall) food, always exhausted, sometimes frustrated = me. Aah! WHAT AM I GOIN’ TO DO?

Status:
Girl: Mom, I need fancy perfumes.
Mom: Go get a husband!

Comments:
A friend : I love your mom.

Hahaha. Thanks 😀 i thought breast cancer is better to talk about 😛 and if my mom sees that status, she’s gonna know i lied to her about studying all night 😛 whichh in my defence, i did plan to do, but i got sleepy 😛 WHERE? TIME? i got stats midterm from 7 to 8 pm 😦 hopefully after 😀 *fingers crossed*
i have a bio midterm on monday…and i dun wanna studyyy…and m bored -_-

And that’s my Fatima’s status:
and i just realized, ammi is our mutual friend 😛 hahaha…chalo koi nahi jee koi nahi XD
And I lived in an illusion for 19 years that my daughter loved me.

Girls- Christina, Shreya, Anchal, Anureet, Preethi, Rishika,Sana, Amna, Fatima- I am still proud of you and wish you good luck in your Midterm Exams.

Great you maintain your sanity and sense of humour despite tremendous pressure.
Love you all.
Keep going…
Ilmana Fasih
8 October 2010

Category:

General, Humour, Personal

A STANDING OVATION TO A LIONESS


A lioness who roars in the day light , burns in agony and pain all night. Lives her ordeal every day as fresh as if it was today. Pain refuses to lessen even an iota.
Ask why?
“Once upon a time, a pretty lioness cub and a daring tiger cub grow up together. Dreaming of a long life with each other as they sail from innocent childhood to blooming youth. Wedding bells ring at the prime of their youth, vowing to live happily ever after.
Three weeks into matrimony, a herd of blood thirsty hounds pounce on the tender lioness for a game. The tiger pounces into action to shield her. All alone facing a herd of savages.
Alas, the lioness watches with her own eyes, her tiger brutally ripped apart by those insane blood thirsty hounds. With his last breath, come crashing down the castles they had built for years.
He departs but she lives on, a dozen and four years now. Still the same pain, still the same love.”
Daylight appears and she is up and roaring, once again.
No one knows how her nights go.
PS: A saga that puts the Oscar winning The Lion King to shame.
I salute this lioness and so should the whole world…

Category:

General, Personal, Social Issues, Women

Enta Omri~ by Umm Kulthoom ~Music without borders


Umm Kulthoom Ebrahim Elbeltagi ( ??  1904-February 3, 1975) was an Egyptian singer, actress and song writer,  known lovingly as  the Star of the East (Kawkab Al Sharq).

More than three decades after her death, she has ataained a near-mythical status among the young Arab fans . She is she is l recognized as one of the Arab world’s most famous and distinguished singers of the 20th century.  Umm Kulthoom is widely regarded as the greatest female singer in Arab music history, that has ever lived.

Coming from a humble peasant family, in her own words about her village: ”

“It was a humble village. The highest building in it did not exceed two stories. The greatest display of wealth was the umdah’s carriage pulled by one horse! . . And there was only one street in the whole village wide enough for the umdah’s carriage . . . I sang in the neighboring villages, all of which were small. I thought that the city of al-Sinbillawayn was the biggest city in the world and I used to listen to news about it the same way one would listen now to news about New York or London or Paris.” 

Gamal Abdel Nasser was an ardent fan of Umm Kulthoom . Some claim that her popularity helped Nasser’s political agenda. For example, Nasser’s speeches and other government messages were frequently broadcast immediately after Umm Kulthoom’s monthly radio concerts.

Her songs deal mostly with the universal themes of love, longing and loss. They are nothing short of epic in scale, with durations measured in hours rather than minutes.

A typical Umm Kulthoom concert consisted of the performance of two or three songs over a period of three to four hours.

Her voice is known to be of the contralto variety, i.e. a deep voice which had the versatility to sing in almost every octave.

“Her ability to produce approximately 14,000 vibrations per second with her vocal cords, her unparalleled vocal strength (no commercial microphone utilized for singing could withstand its strength, forcing her to stand at a 1- to 3-meter radius away from one , and her voice surpassed convention arguably made her one of the most incomparable voices in the world.” writes Wikepedia.

She sang standing amidst an interactive audience.  She sang with a handkerchief in her hand waving with her hand. He moods would  reflected in  her versatile voice and the waving handkerchief was infectious enough to spread among the audience listening her live. Within minutes the audience were  transcended to the heights of  ecstasy by her thrilling  renditions.

You would notice the intervals between her singing interrupted by the enthralled audiences, going euphoric, applauding her and at times asking her to repeat.

Finally my labor has paid off, and my search for the rendition which I was hunting for years,  is finally rediscovered. Please do envy me knowing that, thanks to my father’s love for it,  this was the music I grew up listening to.

ERnta Omri  is one her best known compositions.

Happy listening Umm Kulthoom…

 

Category:

International, Music, Music Without Borders, Personal

OH YOU SMOKERS!


Oh! You think you smoke?
That’s such a funny joke.
You actually burn
Into a chimney you turn.
…
You may so pretend
Cigarette is so cool.
Yeah, with fire at one end
At the other end a fool.
…
Hot you say is smoking
You must be joking.
When the cough gets choking
You’ll sound like croaking.
…
So you think they’re thrillers?
No, they’re a bunch of killers.
Who travel in a pack
And take dead bodies back.
…
Jokes apart:
.
It goes far beyond your throat
Into every cell, far and remote
As the after-effects unfold
It begets ailments untold.
For cigarette was designed
To destroy the mankind.

Ilmana Fasih
9 January 2011
P.S.Written after an argument with my brother Subhi on his terrible smoking habit and seeing Ali’s dp of smoking. And the poem is directed at a lot of other friends and dear ones who’s names I cannot say here.They’ll know who I’m talking about. And to all those who I dont know if they smoke.

Category:

General, Health, Humour, MY POETRY, Personal, Poetry

LIGHTER MOMENTS IN A SERIOUS CONFERENCE


This is how we attended the Conference.

There are moments in a serious conference when atmosphere goes monotonous and one tends to dose off. It is then, when one needs some ‘kicking’ remarks which act as wake up calls.

I was literally asleep at times in 1 UN PLAZA on Sep 21-22 when these snippets served as awakenings:
*” Projects that donot fly are termed Pilot projects.”
* “I donot recommend our US method of moving forward wherein, when for two years guys meet in suits, and finally decide to meet again the next year. “
* “Mobiles phones are our peripheral brains which are gradually taking over our central brains.”
* “In WHO we are observing another epidemic coming up in the health field by the name of Pilotitis.”
* “We Latinos donot eat to be nourished, we eat to be fuul.” a presenter from Dominican Republic.
* “Behind every strong woman , there is a great man.”
* “….. and I live in D.C.(Washington DC) and it happens to be the centre of the Universe.”
* “I am an everyday optimist and I want to get it done before all my hair are gone.I need to rush as you can see only 10% of my hair are left.”
* ” Job of an editor is to separate the wheat from the chaff, and then publish the chaff.”
* ‘I begin by introducing the panelists – some of whom I know since years and with some I have been working very closely with—and by ‘working’ I mean e-Health. Please dont let your great imaginations to fly.” a senior official of a HUGE UN organisation.”
Can imagine how much of ‘serious work’ we were doing for these two days talking about the world’s health!
We were a great bunch of people there, you see….

Dr. Ilmana Fasih
23 September 2010.

Category:

Humour, International, Personal, Uncategorized

TRUST THEM IF YOU WANT TO BE TRUSTED


Food for thought…

“You must trust and believe in people or life becomes impossible.”– Chekhov

I tested this quote in real life today and came out with flying colors…
Date:14 Sep 2010
Time: 8:15 AM
Place :Outside the US Consulate, Toronto.

A strange unscripted drama unfolds...
I had an appointment with the US Consulate to get a visa for attending a “Connect for Health” Conference, New York, next week.I was late for the appointment by 15 minutes (5 minutes over the time limit), due to an accident on the Expressway which had blocked it. I was sure I will be refused the entry because of being a late comer.
I gave a deliberate and fake angel smile at the blue uniformed lady at the gate saying, “I’m sorry I am late because…”

The masked face lady interrupted me and asked back,”Do you have any food, drinks, camera , cellphones or any other electronic devices?”

“No, none of these but….. I have this iPhone.” I said.

The’ mask faced’ changed into a Cruela Devil. She retorted, “You are already late. You have two minutes to give this away and get inside. We donot keep them with us nor do we allow it to be placed within the premises.”

The car was parked two blocks away, so going upto it wasn’t an option.

Suddenly this prized possession turned heavy and cursed. I had just a couple of minutes to decide its fate,or else I miss- my appointment, the visa and hence, the terrific Conference where I have to make a presentation of my decade long work. I had to choose and then act in the next TWO minutes.

I looked around to see if any savior would come forward and volunteer, to hold my cell phone till I return back. All those onlookers who were watching my drama changed their gaze when I looked at them—as if they didn’t know what was going on.

Half a minute had passed in my watch and as if the seconds’ hand was trying to beat the 100 meters world record of Usain Bolt, right then.

I saw two angels descending down from the horizon across the road. I knew they were God sent and one of them will envelope my divine iPhone in his wings.

The first one was a young lady rushing towards her office perhaps. I jumped at her and requested her to keep my cell phone till I’m done from inside. She gave me a wierd look and angled herself away from the potential exploding device in my hand. She walked away quietly not even bothering to say a big “NO”..Not her fault. I fit into the profile of a suspicious person by virtue of my skin color. Without uttering a word, she spoke of volumes of her distrust on me and my iPhone. I felt really helpless for not being trusted.

I knew I will miserably fail in my efforts today, but I didnt want to give up without trying. My presentation and a decade of work behind it was at stake . It was dramatic,  it was embarrassing but I chose to do away with all those senses for just these two minutes of my life.
A few seconds later, I stopped a man , probably in his early thirties and repeated my request to him. He took his hand forward and grabbed the phone without a second look or a second word. I just threw the iPhone into his hand and jumped across the road saying ‘thank you’ half way across the road . He waved at me to take his cell number but I pretended as if I hadnt heard, and rushed into the gate before they got closed on my face. At the doorstep, I made sure that when the lady in blue uniform looks into my face, I will give her a scornful look. And, yes, I did give her one. She was unmoved and was probably immune to such looks day in and day out.

I realized how painful this device was, which was faking itself as a blessing to me for the past one year. I was feeling light.  But the materialistic in me was calculating how much will I lose if I never get this thing back and if the fellow disappears from the scene.  Why would he take this iphone so willingly without even a question?

I took me about a couple of hours inside the consulate to fulfill all the requirements of document check, finger printing, interview etc. Because of the invitation letter, the whole ordeal was a smooth sailing. I still did not regret handing over my iPhone to a random man on the street.

At 10:30 am I was told that the passport would arrive at my house by the weekend, stamped with the visa. I felt I had won a medal at the steeple chase race. I walked out triumphant from the gates.

On the road I looked around as if he would be standing for the past 2 and a half hours,dying to give back my iPhone.  He was nowhere to be seen.

I knew what I had done. What will I tell my folks at home—did I drop it somewhere? I certainly won’t let them know of my foolish act—I will fake it, that I dropped it. Or may be I will tell the truth so that everyone learns a lesson at my cost.

Half sure, I decided to call on my own cell phone number from the public booth. The bell was ringing. Will he pick it up, will he…?

Before I could think of anything else  ,he answered and asked,“‘Did u get your job done ma’am. Wait I am three blocks away from the Consulate and will come down to you in ten minutes”.

His words were music to my ears. I had never felt so relieved in my entire life.  A while later I saw a man coming from across the street. I wasn’t even sure if he was the same person.  I hadn’t even looked at him well enough to recognize him two hours later. He handed over my phone, and smiled.

I thanked him in the politest possible way I could, and he simply shrugged his shoulders,”No big deal lady”.An epitome of dignity he was. “I have to get back to my office”. He turned never to look back again.

I did not have the strength to ask him of his name,or anything else. I couldn’t even say a thank you with my mouth full open. I was overwhelmed.

I still do not know who he was, what his nationality or what  his faith was . I do not even have either his cell number to call him and say thanks , or his name to add him on FaceBook.  He just came and went back like an angel.  He was a human being. Yes, it’s human beings who turn into angels when they help others in need or transform into a satan when in greed.

How right was Abraham Lincoln when he said, “The people when rightly and fully trusted will return the trust”.

In every man resides an angel and a satan.
It is up to us to chose which one we ought to awaken.
We need to awaken the angels from within.
Let the Satan in us die a premature death.
Is it worth putting our i phones at risk?
I am not sure. But, yes, I did so.
I got back not only my iPhone,
but also, a huge trust in the the humanity.
It was worth a try.

You try it too, sometime….

ILMANA FASIH
14 September 2010.
(P.S. Whether I get the visa in time and can make it to the Conference seems a trivial matter now!)

Category:

Personal, Social Issues